I finally broke down. After all the stress and emotional crap swimming around inside my head… it happened. The flood gates opened and everything came out at once (this is why my HoH doesn’t like me to hold things in). The way it happened was such that I think it took my hubby by surprise. I had just gotten out of the shower and was wrapped in a towel, when one of the kids began crying upstairs. He made no move to go upstairs and see what the problem was, so I did. He asked “Where you going baby?”, “The baby is crying.” I replied. He followed me up the stairs and then told me to go back down and finish my shower, and he would take car of the kids. By the time I got back down the stairs, I was sobbing, and I hadn’t really any idea why. Perhaps that I can’t have 5 seconds of peace without a crisis? I don’t know, but it was the straw and I was the camel.
When my Hoh got back down stairs he saw me in tears, and with a confused look he proceeded to hug me and ask why I was crying. Unable to contain myself I blurted out several overwhelming things on my mind at the moment, “I can’t even take a shower without having to run up the stairs and it hurts. The house is a mess, and I hurt too bad to clean it. The kids need baths, and I have school work to do, and I just don’t have it in me to do it all and I feel like I’m failing you.” *Insert hysterical sobbing here*
“hey… baby, the house is not a mess. It’s not that bad. All you have to worry about is kids’ baths and your school work. Everything else can wait.” He said to me as calmly as ever.
“But it is that bad, because if I don’t keep up on the house it will never get clean, and it’ll get messier and be more work if I wait to clean it. You deserve a clean home to be in and I’m breaking the rules by not keeping it up.”
He took a deep breath, kissed my forehead and said “School work, baths. I will take care of the rest. Now finish your shower.”
“Yes, Sir.” He hates it when I call him Sir, but sometimes it just comes out.
I finished my shower and proceeded upstairs where I found him getting ready to vacuum and scrubbing down the dining room table. Aw. My heart felt better and worse at the same time. It was his day off, and a Sunday of all days (we are Christian so we observe Sunday as a day or rest). My sweet hubby. How good he is to me.
Later, I apologized for not being able to get my chores done and breaking down on him, and this was his reply; “It’s not your fault. You have health problems that I was aware of when we got together. This would be like me expecting our son to do his regular chores with a broken leg. It wouldn’t be his fault he couldn’t do it, and this isn’t your fault. You do the best you can, but if it’ll make you feel better I’ll spank you for it later.”
I nodded and nuzzled myself into his arms. Crisis averted. I am truly blessed to have this man in my life.